Day 5: 5 things that irritate you about the opposite sex/same sex

September 23, 2013 § Leave a comment

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1. If you have B.O.

B.O is actually an issue you can control. For the love of God, please invest in extra shower time and a deodorant. Do you know what’s worse than standing next to a person with B.O?

Standing next to a person with really bad B.O.

If you can’t even make an effort in your personal hygiene, that really speaks a lot about you as a person.

2. If you’re suffering from fake accent syndrome.

Seriously, you can’t have an American accent if you’re in LA for 2 weeks. Similarly, you can’t have a British accent from watching 1 season of Sherlock. Having a fake accent does not make you any more superior or elite. In fact, it makes you look insecure, pretentious and really silly in a bad way. No darling, not the Zooey Deschanel/Seth Cohen kinda way.

Because we have heard how you spoke to the aunties in hawker centres. “Eh aunty, I don’t want si ham hor.”

So, if you come and talk to me with a fake accent. I’ll reply you in Singlish hor.

3. If you just stood on the right side of the escalator without moving.

Escalator etiquette needs to be taught in textbooks. Every morning, not only do I have to battle with the crowd in the bus and trains, I also have to battle with the inconsiderate lazy people who just stand on the right side of the escalator without moving.

What’s worse is when I say “Excuse me” politely no one would be bothered to move.

It’s only when I started saying it in a louder volume only then people would start to move to the left…Why do people just like to take nice people for granted?

4. If you play Jesus with me.

The self-righteous condescending stuck-up pricks just piss me off. I don’t need to follow your set of social rules which deemed to be appropriate to be a “good” person. I know I’m a good decent person who will never intentionally hurt another human being.

If you slice my heart open you would actually realise I’m as kind as Jesus. <I can insert a list of amazing things I have done but that would be me preaching>

So, please keep your preachings to yourself.

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5. People who abuse social media.

People who use Facebook status updates/Twitter as a personal diary. People who make Facebook accounts for their pets. People who upload a series of the same images in a row- baby pictures, couple pictures, pet pictures. I get it, you don’t need to flood my timeline to inform me about your happiness. It’s like Arial Bold in size 40 font. I can see it loud and clear.

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